Tired and Retired

"Honor lies in Honest Toil" (Grover Cleveland)

"So does exhaustion, flailing, and profanity, and not necessarily in that order" (G. Fisher)

A recent inspection of our utility cart we use for a myriad of schlepping tasks here on the Ponderosa revealed much to my surprise that both tires were shot. That is to say  they appeared to have been attacked with a chain saw. Honest, I just replaced both (tires and tubes)not even 2 years ago.

 Very few weekends pass during the spring and summer that our little cart isn’t used for the aforementioned utility. This weekend would probably be the last opportunity to replace the tires.

We had to go to Tractor Supply anyway,  so I would see about two new tires. It was my desire to get tubeless tires this go round would  so bought 2 tires and spent 54 bucks. Back home I removed the rotten ones from the rims and was feeling pretty good about myself and the task at hand. I had just begun getting one of the tubeless tires on the rim before I figured out that there was a hole in the rim where the air valve for the tube poked through. The tubed rim would require a tubeless valve. So, remaining calm and not engaging in any use of adjectives, I measured the diameter of the hole in the rim (right at a half inch or so) and it's off to Walmart I ride and $3.57 later two smallest size tubeless valves. Of course they don’t fit. At all. I pushed, shoved, almost used an adjective, but the valves were too big. I was going to have to revert back to the tubed tires using the existing rims or I would have to spend big money on new rims.

I opted for the former.

Back in the car, now back to Tractor Supply as maybe they had some smaller valves or whatever; at this point I figure what I don’t know about utility cart tires would fill up an entire hard drive ( I would say set of encyclopedias but hey it’s 2024). Tractor Supply had no other options so I get my 54 bucks back. I would go to Wal-Mart and get the cheap tires that I had bought less than 2 years ago--the same ones that didn't last. I was nearly half a day into what should have been a 20 minute task. I resolved myself that I would absolutely work until nightfall because my name is George Fisher and I make things harder than they need to be.

I am seriously considering that I have reached critical mass and the only thing left for me to do is to buy a new cart! OH! the Humanity!

I was at my wits end. To wit--this tire thing had me by the short hairs. My hair was falling out. I was helpless, at the end of my proverbial rope, and was on the brink of doing what I always do in case of emergency: Call Shugaluvs.

As a last minute Hail Mary, I decide to go across the highway to Northern Tool Supply. Upon my arrival I see a customer leaving and he is carrying a tire. I cross my fingers hoping that is an omen. I go back to the tire section. Not only do they have the correct size, but as it happened there were also tires already mounted on rims!

It gets better. The tires I needed were ON SALE for $6.99 cents!! I didn't know whether to dance, cry, scream 'Hallelujah' at the top of my lungs, or lose my bladder. I compromised and did a little of all of it.

I made my purchase, got in the car, opened the sunroof and blasted music as loud as I could all the way home! It took me just about a minute and a half to put the new tires on the cart and my task was complete. If possible, I did almost feel like more of an idiot than I did previously. I was raised to believe that you repaired or fixed  what you had instead of just throwing things away, yet by my math I saved $40 bucks. 

Sometimes, its better to be an idiot who saved $40 bucks. And net time, Northern Tool will be my first stop.